nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
where are you?
Hypothermia
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
