Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
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She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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