We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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