Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
