wanna go halves on a baby?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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