Do vagina's smell?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
