it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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