oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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