I seem to have left my pride at pride
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are two peas in an std pod
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize