what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
