Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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