Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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