i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
