This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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