Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
