I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
he fucked my hip out of place.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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