I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize
