adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
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Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
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He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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