So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
