Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
