Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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