she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
