I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
