The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize