Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
