i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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