Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
