All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
