i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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