I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize
