maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Randomize