I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
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the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
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I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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