I need help removing her.
my phone needs a breathalizer
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
