how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
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