Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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