they said they heard you say put it in my butt
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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