explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize