Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
