I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
