pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
