Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
