its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
