I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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