I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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