So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
