i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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