She announced her abortion via fbk
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
