You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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