so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize