I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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