therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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