I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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